198 Days Later...Update to September 2016

I don't know where the time has gone, but I've been working on several projects:

1) Our puppy, Denzel, turned 1 year old...a major milestone in the life of a mammal, as the first year of life is the most uncertain...mammals of less than a year have shorter nails and teeth, and lack the experience necessary to stay alive; instincts are there, but the mammal has not yet learned to listen to those instinctive whispers that tell them, "Don't go near the cliff" or "Don't run into the dark cave; you're cold, but the greater danger can lie inside." In humans, all this develops much later; we are vulnerable mammals so, from the first human-like footstep emerging from the primordial ooze, we have surrounded ourselves with mammals possessing larger and sharper teeth and nails, particularly those partial to Merrick Salmon and Sweet Potato Dog Food.

2) My husband, Jim, started taking Denzel to dog agility training. I believe this was mainly because the puppy turned a 8 x 12 area rug into placements while we were out having dinner one night, thus making us realize he (the dog) required more exercise than his 3-mile daily walk. The link between handler and dog on the agility course is a graceful movement; the dog darts through, between and over the various obstacles with the handler providing standardized arm movements to signal the dog and provide encouragement. This graceful dance of handler and dog is non-existent in new teams, like Jim and Denzel; the dog is firmly attached to a lead, preventing the demerits associated with stopping, sniffing and running off to play with the dogs waiting patiently on the side of the agility course. Leaps once completed with a happy hopping motion are half-heartedly made by the end of the course, and Denzel is tired, too. The sight of a 65 pound, black-and-white spotted dog running playfully over the ramps and through the weave poles provides enough hilarity to receive an invitation back each week!

3) A friend I've known since Junior Girl Scouts celebrated her birthday. We all have friends we've known for most of our lives, and we might have fallen out of touch periodically over the years, but reconnecting is filled with fun memories and the challenges faced through the early years of growing up. Her mother was my GS leader and a friend of my mother's. Reconnecting may have been a bit harder on her, as my Mom is gone (almost 30 years now) and my Dad, too (about 25 years), so my friend's parents remember the loss of their friends; they've never met my children, who live in other states, and their parents, our grandparents, are gone, reminding them they are the next generation on the Grim Reaper's hit list. The Circle of Life, or the progression of time, as I've heard these changes referred to, should not remind us of only loss and change, but of love and experiences unique to us and those we've touched. With my parents gone, I'm in that next generation to start dying off, but I find that a much better alternative than skipping to my children; my maternal grandmother lost four of her five children before she died; in my memory, she rarely smiled or laughed, but she belonged to some groups - Royal Neighbors, Salvation Army, The Grandmother's Club - and I hope she had friends in those groups, who gave her something to laugh about and provided her an opportunity to remember her fun memories. I hope I was one!

4) My brother, Jack, my only sibling, had a birthday this month. Jack had a sarcastic sense of humor, which he cultivated in his younger sibling just because we shared the same airspace in front of the family's black and white TV set. Homework was completed on the coffee table while watching Father Knows Best and The Rifleman. We were close growing up, with the usual periods of falling out of touch which can happen when sibs marry and start their own families. I moved out of state with Jim; Jack stayed local. I worked as a nurse and traveled with work; Jack was a contractor and traveled to get away from work. My nephew spent a few summers with us, getting to know his cousins and their cousins on Jim's side of the family. When I moved back to California, Jack helped me move, helped me drag home garage sale treasures to furnish my rental, and just kept me company when isolation and boredom felt heavy upon us both. When Jim retired and we bought a house near the beach, Jack was our contractor and Jack stayed in a bedroom at our rental, rather than drive 2 hours each way everyday. I was finishing up my dissertation one day when he returned to the rental house to get cleaned up at the end of the day, and he asked me, "How much longer?" meaning how much longer was I going to be sitting on the couch typing on my laptop; when would I be done so I could listen to him play his guitar, help him with his laptop, go through old photos or get something to eat? My usual reply was, "Soon," but on this one particular day, with the sun shining bright, the birds tweeting joyfully, and the landscapers' leaf blowers thundering outside, I was able to answer, "I just hit 'Send' and my paper is winging it's way to my Chair, as we speak." The past couple years of papers strewn everywhere, Post-It notes on the walls, and textbooks with scraps of paper marking the important pages was now over. Jack stopped on his way to his bedroom and sat on the couch for a moment. "Mom and Dad would be so proud of you." And that statement, ladies and gentlemen, became the last line on my Dedication page.

5) September 2016 marked 29 years of marriage for Jim and I. We sat helpless and watched many marriages implode or just fade away, stating whatever the cause would not happen to us - infidelity being the main one - and we've been able to keep that commitment for all these years. When others are asked, "How did you stay together all these years?" they typically answer, "We never went to bed angry at each other." or "We talked things out." or "We had separate bank accounts so we never fought over money." Jim and I had separate offices or, at the least, separate desks or, at the very least, separate computers. The idea of a family computer sounds economical and cozy, with visions of family members gathered around the screen talking to grandma over the camera or composing a family letter to accompany all those Christmas cards mailed out each year. This terrified me. When it comes to mouse positioning, Jim is left-handed and I'm right-handed; I like my monitor mounted on the wall directly in the middle of my face, while Jim is fine with the monitor sitting on the desk and tilted up; Jim likes inboxes and folders on his work surface, maybe a blotter; I like files in desk drawers, neat stacks of papers in the order of priority and Post-It note reminders in a straight line down one side of my desk top; I won't even discuss differences in chair settings. I remember the days of one computer in our household...sitting on a broken chair because we'd adjusted it so many times the handles fell off; trying not to move Jim's files while mine were often displaced to surfaces where my papers melted into the existing piles of clutter; moving the joystick for playing a Star Wars game and unplugging the keyboard and/or the mouse in the tangle of wires; climbing under the desk to plug in the wires only to come out looking like the Abomidable Snowmonster from Rudolph, the Red-nosed Reindeer television special. I have never criticized families where everyone had a computer in any form, including a smartphone, and many is the time Jim and I have texted notes back and forth just because we could versus calling one another. I have never thought my marriage was stronger because my husband and I communicated in person!

That brings us to September...next time, October 2016, complete with recall bias!

Just Another Day

Weekly Blog in Construction Phase...please be patient!

What is Just-Another-Day?

Just-Another-Day chronicles my personal health challenges after caring for others as a Registered Nurse (since 1985), a wife and mother (since 1987), and a clinical research nurse (since 1988).

As a researcher, my first reaction to the findings of a test or upon receiving a new diagnosis is to read numerous articles published in peer-reviewed journals documenting the results of studies for each health challenge I have faced. In the majority of instances, I have found conflicting results, or areas for further research, as well as a wide variety of testing and treatment avenues provided by various practitioners.

My hope is that my search for information, my experiences, and my challenges will be useful for others, as they begin or move through their own experiences and challenges; that the questions and observations raised in this blog might assist researchers in the development of new studies, and these same questions and observations may be used by health care providers to address gaps in the provider's knowledge base, as well as patient education information.

This is a blog, not an expert opinion, and, as a blog, I am not responsible for the content being applicable to any one person's challenge; I am not offering medical or nursing advice; I am writing about my experiences, and I am not providing information as a consultant. Read about my experiences, and talk to others about the information provided, which may or may not be applicable to you, your family or your friends.